THE PERFECT PLATFORMER! Ep. 19: Hammers
You know the drill... well, the hammer... whatever, just keep reading...
Editor’s Note: This is episode 146 of Flapperdoodle’s Gaming Blog.
*looks through ideas for blogs*
Hm… I can't seem to think of anything to write about… hm…
Wait a minute… wasn't there some series I was working on… a series where I discuss aspects of a certain genre or something… and then I'd go on to discuss examples of the aspects. I dunno… it sounds so familiar. It's on the tip of my tongue… I know the name… c'mon brain, c'mon!
OH! I GOT IT! IT'S CALLED…
Today's return to form for my favorite series to write is gonna involve a weapon seen in tons of video games. That mighty double sided behemoth of a weapon is the…
Yes. Many, many, many moons ago, my buddy FrankHaggar asked me to do an episode on Hammers. But because so many other ideas hit me, I never got to it. But the wait is over Frank buddy, cause I am gonna do that episode right here, right now. The beauty of a hammer is that not only is it easy to hold, but it can cause a ton of damage. Like, seriously, a ton. Plus, if an element is attached, like fire or ice for example, expect some truly devastating attacks. The following four hammers are weapons that any trained combatant would be lucky to have in their arsenal.
The Hammers (Tomba! 2: The Evil Swine Return)
To be totally honest, I don't know too much about the status of Tomba, or Tomba 2. I barely know of what people think of it. My friend told me about the duo of games, and though I was never an avid fan of the Playstation, I said "what they hey?" and decided to try them both out. I mean, hey, the first Tomba is seen as a Playstation Classic, so how bad can it honestly be? The first Tomba was a very nice platformer, and so was Tomba 2. And when we're talking hammers, it's hard to forget about Tomba 2. Tomba 2 has three different hammers. The first one is alright, but it wasn't exactly super powerful… to be honest, it was never meant to be, as it's mainly used for activating switches. But hey, a guy can want something special, right? That's where the Fire Hammer comes in. The Fire Hammer can actually stop enemies that are made of ice (hence the "fire" part). I like using the Fire Hammer, even if sometimes it can become a little tedious just swinging it to stun. The damage is minimal, if existent. Besides, again, it's mainly supposed to be used for switches, and not much else. It's really the Torch Hammer that gets me excited… and not in that sick way you twisted, naughty people. The Torch Hammer can easily get rid of enemies, essentially in one hit. It can also break fricken stones. Yeah… full stone blacks up in Kujara Summit. You gotta admit, that makes it even more useful. I really wish it was more important as far as the game is concerned, because it isn't really essential. But I digress, the hammers in Tomba 2 are nice additions to the game, and allow for you to feel at least a bit like a badass.
Piko Piko Hammer (Sonic Adventure)
Sonic's universe is chock full of characters at every corner. Some are beloved, while others fall to the wayside many-a-time. Amy Rose is one of those characters. But many people seem to dismiss the fact that Amy can do some serious damage. Sure, she's a little crazy, and by that I mean crazy in love with Sonic, but she has a very useful weapon on her side, and that is the Piko Piko Hammer. It's red, it's yellow, and it can get behind a fellow… or fella? I dunno. It's Amy's signature weapon, seen in nearly every game she's in, but we'll focus on its appearance in Sonic Adventure. Amy doesn't really get much of a story in Sonic Adventure. She just happens to get sucked into the whole underlying arc of the entire game, as a robot named ZERO starts pursuing her as she is in the possession of a Flicky with a chaos emerald in it's pendant. Amy refuses to let it go, leading to wacky hijinks. For defense, she uses the Piko Piko Hammer throughout, as it allows her to kick some serious ass. She can take out all kinds of robots, really in one or two fatal swoops. Amy can already jump super high and super far, but with a hammer, those jumps are aided by powerful swings of a hammer. Seriously, this hammer is crazy powerful. It's surprising that Amy can even wield it. I know the hearts don't really help with the whole badass appeal, but I truly feel that in the hands of a true vigilante, this could be an intimidating weapon.
Hobby Horse (Alice: Madness Returns)
I'm gonna be honest, I am NOT very familiar with the Alice series. I appreciate the darkness of them, and they look stylistically interesting. Sadly, I just haven't made time to play them. But I have watched gameplay segments of them, and I instantly fell in love with the sheer brute force of this weapon. The Hobby Horse (technically not a real hammer, but essentially playing the role as one) is a very heavy toy horse, and it packs a huge amount of oomph when it hits anything. It's a bit hard to carry, and leaves Alice with some cumbersome fighting abilities, but when it succeeds in hitting a guy, by George it's gonna do some damage. It allows Alice to destroy shielding items enemies may be using, and it also can break intrusive blocks. The hammer also has this earthquake-esque ability in which the force it causes is so strong, it travels outwards to any other enemy in range. So yeah, it's fricken strong. But that's only half the reason why I love the Hobby Horse. The design of the Hobby Horse is so badass and creative. Sure, it's that dumb galloping toy little kids use when they are that bored with action figures, but they have added a nice twisted aspect to it, combining it with the idea of it being a knight's horse, not to mention a demon horse. Thus, as the item is upgraded, the design becomes more intricate, and simply more awesome. By the fourth version of the tool, it becomes a straight up metallic unicorn, horn and all, with golden glowing eyes to boot. Now if I had a steed like that, I'd be riding that thing 'till kingdom come… again… not in that sick perverted way… weirdos.
The Hammer Ability (Kirby)
Now this is a classic. Everyone who's played a Kirby game knows how truly awesome the Hammer ability is. It's been in plenty of Kirby games, some of them being the best in the whole franchise. The Hammer is probably one of, if not the most powerful normal copy ability. It's pretty much a one-hit K.O. on most of the enemies, weaker or stronger. Plus, it's awesome to see Kirby swing a huge mallet around. Aw, how cute, right? No, DANGEROUS! Yeah. Plus, the Hammer is not a very common ability to find. The only enemy that immediately comes to mind is Bonkers, the huge purple ape that wields the damn hammer. I guess it's available in other ways throughout the series, but you get what I'm saying. But probably the coolest version of the Hammer ability was shown off in the latest Kirby adventure, Kirby's Return to Dreamland, with the Grand Hammer. Kirby basically gets a hammer that is about the same size as his normal hammer, and he can essentially break… anything with it. You, of course, have to put your back into it, as the hammer can become bigger in size if you shake the Wii Remote, thus causing a bigger smash down when applied. I found these segments of Return to Dream Land to be incredibly fun, mainly because the Hammer was intuitive, and… who doesn't like swinging a giant Golden Hammer around for fun? I mean… c'mon? In conclusion, if it wasn't obvious enough, the Hammer ability is awesome. Seriously, Kirby is a beast when wielding this thing around, and if you ever get in a fight with Kirby and a hammer, my only suggestion is to run away as fast as humanly possibly. Sadly though, that probably won't help. Sorry. Have fun!
And there you go Frank! I hope you enjoyed it. Speaking of which, feel free to leave requests. I would happy to accept them. But ya see… the next episode is gonna… well… be a little different. It is, after all, Episode 20. Stay tuned for that. Catch you on the flip side!
- Larry :)
I've personally always found myself privy towards the Barbarian Hammer from God of War II.
You can also throw Kirby's hammer, though that is not advisable.
Ok that's it, I'M THROWIN' HAMMERS!
The Hammers from Monster Hunter. 'Nuff said.
Link's Megaton Hammer from Wind Waker is made of win and a skull. And the hammers from Fable can get pretty crazy. The Hobby Horse though... can't argue with that one.