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Sega Officially Licenses Sonic the Hedgehog Porn for Additional Revenue

12/17/12 2:46pm
tl;dr

sonic porn. enough said

 

With Sega relying heavily on their Japanese arcade games to stay afloat and shutting down European offices, many predict that their video game days are over. Today, Sega has announced they are selling officially licensed Sonic porn.

 

For those who traverse the dark sprawls of the internet, Sonic the Hedgehog porn is not difficult to find. In fact, there is a dedicated size of the fan base who enjoy writing erotic fiction and drawing nude pictures of the hedgehog. Many deride these fans; however, but there are some who have made money off them. Enough so that Sega wants a piece of the pie.

In an announcement related to their video game ventures, Sega has announced targeting artists and writers who have abused the Sonic trademark for erotic works and offering leniency if they transfer the rights to the work towards Sega. Sega has also announced they will target high-profile artists to help develop an official marketplace for Sonic erotica.

Sega CEO Hajime Satomi justifies this extreme course of action in a press release statement:

Sonic the Hedgehog is still a valuable license despite the many mistakes made with the video game series. Regardless of how the video games perform, there are other avenues of revenue associated with the series through arcade games, comics and animation. Through our research, adult fans of Sonic the Hedgehog clamor for adult entertainment and I believe we are missing a huge opportunity by not satisfying these fans. We can not afford to shun any type of revenue no matter how bad this may look upon the company. We would rather survive and be called every name in the book than die without a fight.

Sega’s site for ordering a future erotica collection starring Sonic the Hedgehog has already crashed due to the high volume of traffic received since the announcement.

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g1 DISCUSSIONS

BobboHead13

December 18, 2012 - 3:35am

The grammar in this is too good...you copied this story right from the website -___-

Prowler64

December 18, 2012 - 2:18am

I like fake news like this when there is kind of something weird that makes it sounds legit, but I've noticed usually they all have one thing in common. The last sentence says something ridiculous that gives it away. Kind of ruins the fun of it. Otherwise, nicely played.

Lloyf

December 18, 2012 - 1:25am

This is a good joke and it made me laugh but I'm sure it's fake. I'm 99.9% sure the CEO of Sega would not say "We can not afford to shun any type of revenue no matter how bad this may look upon the company".

Ferret75

December 17, 2012 - 6:21pm

I'm pretty sure this is fake.

They Call Me The Fizz

December 17, 2012 - 5:05pm

It's a fake... Check out some of the other articles by Play4Real... They're an "Onion"

Pogue-Mahone

December 17, 2012 - 3:57pm

I heard about this on Game Grumps. Still not sure if it's legit, but it's definitely newsworthy. Won't truly believe it until there's an actual source, which there probably isn't. Like the first comment on that page says, "Sega is not a source," and "Try harder to make believable fake news." I say it's fake.

DRQ

December 17, 2012 - 5:03pm

its still a funny fake

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