Top 10 Badasses with Glasses

Posted on July 26, 2012 - 2:30pm by MagnumMagnus

TLDR;

Shades are hardly the only eyeware a stone-cold killer would don on a trip to lay waste to his foes.

I present to you my personal (hapzardly thrown together) list of the 10 layers of the smackdown who may or my not need corrective lens.

(Note: I used characters from games, manga, and comics, as they are my three main forms of entertainment. Also, I WILL be using *SPOILERS*)

First, some honorable mentions:

Yu Narukami: Protagonist of Persona 4, a game many love, but I've never played and therefor know nothing about.

Julia Chang (denim costume): Protects the environment with kung fu. Sadly, Tekken has disappointed me in resent years, so that knocks her outta the running.

Gaijin Goomba: A fellow g1 and my personal hero. Wields his obsidian blade against the Fumon clan to banish ignorance from gaming culture. As a g1 however, he is excluded from entry (sorta like how family of employees are excluded from contests.)

And now for the real deal!

10. Sousuke Aizen (Bleach)

The former Cpatain of Squad 5 just barely irked his way into my #10 spot for the simple fact that (up until the end of his arc) he was master of manipulation and more than capable of bringing down all but the most powerful of foes with the greatest of ease.

I put him at the bottom despite his overwhelming badassery simply because right after he reveals his true nature, he destroys his glasses and slicks his hair back.

Bleach has disappointed me in recent years, but I'll never forget how intimidating and badass Aizen was in his prime.

9. Kabuto Yakushi (Naruto)

Now here's a fellah who actually keeps his glasses on!

Kabuto's lead something of a rough life. He was an orphan who was taken from the orphanage where he was being raised to act as a spy in other villages. In time, he allied himself with the rogue ninja Orochimaru, and used his years of assassination and medical experience to further his new master's goals.

Able to form a scalpel entirely out of his own chakra (energy), and with skills exceptional even amongst expert ninjas, Kabuto only become more dangerous when he injected himself with Orochimaru's cells and transformed himself into a man-snake.

Utilizing his former master's reanimation jutsu, Kabuto resurrected a cadre of dead elite ninjas to wreak havoc upon the ninja world.

While his ultimate fate in the manga remains uncertain, Kabuto as most definitely left his scaley impression on the world of glasses-wearing badasses.

8. Tashigi (One Piece)

 

I have to admit, I haven't followed One Piece for very long.

I came in to the story fairly late, and had to play catch-up on a lot of things. During that time, one character stood out in my mind: Tashigi.

In a world where the military is at best overzealous and at worst corrupt, an officer who truly believes in the concept of justice is greatly appreciated.

Little is known about Tashigi thus far, other than her resemblance (in both appearance and fighting style) to Roronoa Zoro's late childhood friend/rival Kuina. She is a master swordswoman, able to handle a dozen foes all on her own, and is respected enough by her G5 subordinates (who seem to be of questionable background) that they follow her obidiently (although that may also have to do with how cute she is.)

She is the right-hand lady to Admiral Smoker, a notorious pirate hunter and frenemy of Monkey D. Luffy. The fact that she has held this postion as long as she has is testament to her abilities as a marine.

While it remains to be seen how much of an impact she will make in One Piece, it cannot be denied that she is quite the bespctacled badass beauty.

7. Hubert Oswell (Tales of Grace f)

This one's a bit of my own guilty pleasure, but I'm a sucker for the Tales of series, and as of this article, I've been playing the crap out of Tales of Graces f.

The younger of Lord Aston Lhant's sons, Hubert was a bit of a crybaby as a kid.

Sent off to the prestigious Oswell family in Strahta to receive a military education, Hubert quickly rose through the ranks to become lieutenant at the tender age of 17.

Though initially bitter towards his brother over his adoption, he eventually came to terms with it in order to face a much greater threat.

A master of the dualblade (a doublebladed sword which somehow turns into a pair of pistols), Hubert is one of the most versatile fighters in the game, as well as one of the smartest.

If he has one drawback, it's that he can still get flustered if things don't go as he plans.

Cool, calm, and ready for any scenario, Hubert Oswell places himself firmly in my #7 spot.

6. Bayonetta

She's sorta like Dante from Devil May Cry.

Only female.

And just as sexy.

Okay, more so.

She's essentially a witch who fights with various magical torture devices generated from her hair (which also makes up her clothes) and guns (including a pair built into her highheels).

The epic scale of her battles is difficult to describe, and her sexuality is of a type so unique, The GameOverThinker dedicated an entire episode to it.

I really don't think there's much else to be said now, so I'm just gonna keep staring at her cleavage while you guys keep going odwn the list.

5. Clark Kent (Superman)

Those of you who've been living under a rock will probably think "What's so badass about this douchebag?"

Anymore stupid questions?

In Clark's case (alliteration ho!),  the glasses are means for him to conceal his true identity of Superman (somehow).

If I really need to explain to you why Superman is a badass, you don't belong here. That said, Kent's glasses serve as a sort of mask for his heroic self. Ironic, given most heroes wear a mask to hide that side of them.

While Superman doesn't wear his glasses into action, any who know his dual identity know that the Man of Steel wears frames of Steel as well.

4. Medic (Team Fortress 2)

The character who inspired me to make this list in the first place.

Healers never get the respect they deserve, yet it's always their fault when the group gets slaughtered.

If you were to say that to this guy, he'd probably hack your arm off with his bone saw then beat you incessantly with it.

It takes a hefty pair to run around the battlefield with minimal weaponry and a device which heals from afar, but activate ubercharge and you've got about 10 seconds of "gimme your best shot! What, not enough? Die!" for Medic and his "patient."

This is one doctor you'll need plenty of apples to keep away.

3. Franken Stein (Soul Eater)

Yet another medical practioner who you'd prefer not be allowed anywhere near a scalpel, much less a shape-shifting scythe.

A staff member and warrior for the Death Weapon Meister Academy or Shidusen, Stein is your typical mad-scientist type, often expressing his interest in "dissecting" the people he meets.

When first introduced in the series, he easily fends off the heroes best efforts to strike him, all while sitting reverse-style in an office chair.

An expert in hand-to-hand combat and possessing a high compatability with a number of humanoid weapons, Stein is certainly a formidable foe on his own. But when he stradles the line between sanity and madness you'd best step aside, lest you end up as one of his "experiments."

I think this image will give you a hint of what I mean:

2. Peter Parker (Spiderman)

(Couldn't find an image from the comics where he's wearing glasses)

Parker's higher than Kent?

Well, it's my list, and I'm more of a Marvel fellah.

Where Clark Kent/Superman is more of a legendary figure, Peter Parker/Spiderman is more down-to-Earth.

Although the radioactive/genetically altered spider bite gave him super strength, agility, and better eyesight (amongst other things), Peter is still, at his core, a bespectacled nerd. Only difference now is he can kick some ass, which he does.

Responsibly.

Whereas Kent kinda became Superman with little to no problems and has few conflicts with his dual identity (depending on the version, of course), Parker had to struggle with the issues of being a super hero and a teen, then later adult.

That he can keep on trucking despite all the crap that comes with those powers is no small feat.

Linkara once said "DC makes heroes you can look up to. Marvel makes heroes you can relate to."

In my mind, a true badass is not some perfect being, but one who overcomes great challenges to become greater than they were.

1. Kohta Hirano (Highschool of the Dead)

Who says fattys can't kick some major ass?

Kohta Hirano is by no means a perfect character; he's a little too attached to his guns, he gets pushed around by women a bit too easily, and having to kill his first (sort of) girlfriend rather than see he devoured by undead certainly didn't do his mental state any favors.

What can be said, however, is that he is a loyal friend and compatriot, an expert marksman trained by none other than Blackwater (briefly), an older brother figure to an orphaned little girl, a skilled improvisor, and fearless in the face of a zombie apocalypse.

Kohta is responsible for seeing his team through some of their most dangerous encounters, and has provided on the spot training for his fellow survivors in the heat of battle.

He is what many of us wish to be; someone looked down upon by society who rises up in the face of circumstances never seen before.

While the series has been on hiatus for over a year now, I hope to god that it continues eventually, because it's been so long since Kohta Hirano's been able to shoot a walking corpse in the head, and it's making me feel sad...

I feel better.

Well g1s, that's my list. Think you can do better?

Lemme know your own Badasses with Glasses in the comments below, or better yet, post your own.

I encourage you. Nay, I challenge you!

Show me up!

Show me what bespectacled icons you think deserve praise.

» Comments: 63

g1 Discussions

Use a Facebook account to add a comment, subject to Facebook's Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. Your Facebook name, photo & other personal information you make public on Facebook will appear with your comment, and may be used on ScrewAttack's media platforms.

Around The Web